December 9, 2010

It's felt like a cap on information has been in place for many weeks. The fall equinox began a series of many wonderful events and the "hurry up and wait"phase was in full swing. Life appeared normal, with a strange void...where was of that sense of waiting in the trenches? Then last week cast a spell of silence over many of us. Frankly, my internal processes; mentally, emotionally and energetically, were so extreme, that I didn't want to share them with anyone. By Monday, I felt like a woman who had just given birth to a full term baby, not knowing at all that I was pregnant.

Through the month of November, I was in a crisis over what 12 step programs refer to as spiritual principals.....honesty, hope, faith, courage, integrity, willingness, humility, brotherly love, justice, perserverance, spiritual awareness and service. If you've ever seriously worked such a program, these steps start to work you. As days passed by, I could name the step that was presenting itself and there were distinct moments of "God doing for me what I could not do for myself." As much as I love this feeling, the question was unavoidable...Who or What is God? Right about the time of all the hub bub over new airport security measures, I was feeling a daily and very personal shakedown.

I was told that I had created a blockage to seeing clearly and that I had a single string that was woven throughout the many levels and layers of my hologram. It was holding memory from spending eons of time in this distorted Universal system, things I do not want to remember. Just to make it all more complex, I had a contract to hold the emotional body for my Source gestalt, a group of five, with four beings to act as pillars, to make a grouping of nine and two "sleeper" beings that adds up to eleven....the 9-11 codes. Once pure, these codes have been usurped and used for destruction within the matrix. Underneath the memory is pure, untapped rage. Great.

The question of Who or What is God? became an instant luxury and I began a vigorous process of clearing. I held an image of the string in my closed eye vision and attached silver bells to hold the memory, asking for assistance in the removal of it all. Through the act of intention, I began to flow Step Two through the veins of my body ......Came to believe that a power greater than myself could restore me to sanity.

I watched the process within myself and knew the rage was turning to fire. Massive multi dimensionality set in and I had a difficult time tracking anything. My 3D life became surreal. While traveling over Thanksgiving, on the freeway at 75 miles per hour, our vehicle struck a dog head on. It looked like Victor, our next door neighbor's pet when I was a child. The dog was seen running safely away, no blood to be found on the car. A brown substance moved into my brain and told me to die. Still, I held the single string in my third eye and continued to clear. The fire of rage began to merge with air and water.

Days later, I had awoke to a vision of the sun, as a star in the night sky, circled by more stars. I called it the Star of Bethlehem and it turned into a massive ball of glowing sacred geometry. The multi dimensional experiences began to lessen and I found myself existing in a space that I did not at first recognize. Massive steam had melted away a mold that was around my light body and allowed me into the space of the Rishi, the 15 dimensional, first layer of our time space matrix. There, I saw that the personality I have was designed perfectly and all the flaws that I perceive in myself will melt away when my vision is restored.

What has happened to us all, this crazy past week is a recycling of the matrix. It has not changed, it is in our face projecting an image of itself unto us. We are here, in it and not of it any longer.