June 16th, 2011

For a few weeks now, codes have been back and on me like white on rice. This signals the release of our Ancients and a transfer of responsibility to us, for the final days of clearing. What was not possible in other cycles of time, due to the under development of our personal, spiritual technology, is no longer relevant. This begs the question to each of us individually, whom do you serve?

This is a very delicate question to ask and it has bothered me for a long time now. I am grateful that the time is here in NOW to ask it of all of you. I share my process with you in hopes that it is helpful.

Lately, life had been back to feeling like I was sitting in the trenches, so much boredom, with too much time to question the anxiety I was feeling. I had to examine this and it begged the questions of identity. Only soldiers sit in trenches and do I want that for myself? No, plain and simple, no. I am sick to death of being triggered into dark thoughts every time I see a distortion manifested upon this reality. Why does this even happen? Because I am holding the knowledge of what was and forgetting the promise of who I am.

I recently found the last embodied member of my gestalt of nine. Unbeknown to him, was that he was holding Atlantian memory for Lotus and Dragon lineages. I was challenged to examine my own reveals over the last 6 years and came to the conclusion that not another one of my family was going to feel the pain of this drama, in order to step into a position that was quickly dissolving anyway.

As all things good here are a projection onto the screen that is us, I searched for solution and resolution. Since the start of my journey in 2005, I have had to say "yes" to so much, in spite of my fear, ignorance and innocence. Then, I was reminded of an experience many years ago, that explained to me it is truly only God that says stop in this earthly place. I dug deep into my own divinity to connect to that God power in the word "stop". I was able gently release my family member from holding the Atlantian trauma, with out pain or injury to myself.

Shortly after, I began to experience the releasing of what I refer to as Mother Source energy. As it flowed through me, there was massive rage to behold, coupled with bitterness and resentment. In my role as an Ancient, holder of the cosmic body, yet not the origin of Mother, I did not claim any of this, and in a day or two the energy changed into sadness and a feeling of destitution, loneliness and failure. These, I could relate to, having been a mother in this lifetime with all of these feelings towards parenting my children. I knew that the trick was release and it happened in a new way.

Now that we are not so multi dimensional, having anchored much into ourselves what we are, and formless within our auric field, I saw that identities of myself were layered like faces made of cellophane over the entire skull. As I pushed them up off my head, I began to fill them with all thoughts associated with the negative and immature (spiritually) emotions and sent them away. My anxiety is leveling off, though life is still quite odd.